The Art of Cancer

I originally made this SoulCollage® card in the spring of 2011, just a few months before my diagnosis of secondary angiosarcoma of my left breast (NOT breast cancer).  I wasn’t sure what she was saying to me, but the energy of the card felt strong and protective to me.

That July, when I found out I was going to have  a mastectomy, I happened to draw this card in one of the short readings I do with my cards every other day. At that time, she was saying to me:

I am the one who is keeping away anything and anybody who is not conducive to your highest and best healing. I am the one who is giving you PERMISSION to say no to anything that doesn’t help you to feel good, to feel better, to heal. My gift to you is protection. I give you the knowing that you are worth protecting and worth healing and that you can raise your own hand (literal, metaphoric, it doesn’t matter) to keep away that which doesn’t belong in your own precious life.

Today, several months later, I drew this card again in one of my random short readings.  And today, well… WOW! Just read on:

I am the one who is standing in front of the Universe. I am the one who is holding up my hand so no one will come near/intrude.

I am the one who is standing in front of my body, my chest. The left breast is now gone, a bright, illuminated scar in its place. My right breast, created anew by my beloved plastic surgeon, is now shiny and new, in perfect proportion to the rest of me.

I am the one who is saying ENOUGH! NO MORE PLASTIC SURGERY!  Not now, anyway. Not at this time. I am not ready for my body to be scarred yet again. Not now. Maybe another year, but NOT NOW.

I am the one who is protecting you from any more physical changes of the surgical kind. Before/after your mastectomy, I was giving you wisdom and advice about staying away from anything that was not healing for you, to protect your boundaries and I am still saying that to you.  And now, my meaning, my message, has increased, widened, deepened.

So, again…..WOWEE!  I always get what I need from my SoulCollage® cards!  I had been contemplating having reconstruction surgery on my mastectomied breast, but this card tenderly touched on exactly what I need right now, which is no more surgery!

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